Asking for What I Want
by Nancy Bowers, RScP
“Fear is the cheapest room in the house. I would like to see you living in better conditions.” – Hafez
God is fearless. Certain of Power, Confident in Purpose, what would frighten that which is Love itself? The Surety of God is everywhere – in the sun that rises each morning, in the birds that sing when they delight to discover a feeder brimming with sunflower seeds, in the very pulse of life. God is doubtless. Love is always the answer. Joy is forever the reason to be. Eternally Generous, God gives lavishly. It is I who forgot to ask for what I wanted.
And now, in this moment of remembrance, where I return to the awareness that God wants me in better living conditions, I unite with my Source. I listen to the whispers God speaks of my value. I know that He and I are One. I surrender to Her wisdom. I see Christ in every brother. I recognize how deliciously It has provided me with playmates.
God is everywhere, constantly giving in delight.
Yet somewhere along the way, I picked up a false belief. I took up residence with fear and acted as if I had no right to ask for what I want – not what I think is possible, or good enough, but for what I really want. So in this moment, this NOW of prayer, I claim it for me. We are all connected, so I claim in for you, too. Our Father is an egalitarian, for Oneness could never separate out sweet variety into categories to be judged. Our Mother knows appearances are just temporary. Ask for what you want. Know it is the Father’s good pleasure to give you the Kingdom.
So here’s the list, O Lord, of all, okay perhaps only some of what would make my heart sing psalms of delight. Give me Love. Give me Peace. Give every need fulfilled. Give me Trust in Your Goodness. Let me relish in Your Altruism. Let me know that it is not that I ask too much, but that I ask for far too little. Let me remember that it was never Your Intent that I have the cheapest room in the house. Help me to remember Your Infinite Love. May I know that I am always safe and cared for and so there is no reason for me to hold back like a frightened child.
I am like you, Lord, and so I am confident in that truth and behave as if I know it always. Keep my faith strong that I continuously remember the truth of who I am – the heartthrob of the Divine, who spoils me delectably when I let the flow of Goodness in.
So I give thanks. I remember who I am and I give thanks that God is a Generous God. God is a Yes-Man. All of life is for Good. I give thanks that when I just allow, the suffering ends. Do I see the gifts right in front of me? Do you?
Then I let go. Grateful for my life, I let go of any idea that there is anything to fear. God is a much more magnanimous host than I have realized, so I ask for what I want, and give in kind in fearlessness. I was always already that which I sought, and so, my friend, were you. And so it is and always has been. Amen.