The Aloneness?
by Chaplain Tilia Giron, RScP, PhD
May I honor the aloneness
Though it feels heavy in the air
Like the lack of something or someone that once was there.
An air of expectancy permeates the silence
Awaiting a presence that fails to appear.
I sit with the silence and the air of absence.
Rather than hasten to fill the space,
I quietly choose to accept the vacant emptiness
Allowing and being.
I cannot, will not, choose not to ‘fix’ me or the air about me.
That implies it or I am broken, in need of repair
As if it is not ok to sit in aloneness or in absence or in emptiness.
Not ok to be with what is.
I’ve thought that so often in the past about me – Not ok.
I refuse to go there anymore.
I accept the heaviness hanging in the air
Giving it space.
I don’t have to fill it or me
I choose to be ok with what is.